Why did I write this letter to my pessimistic ex-girlfriend?

“Be the change that you wish to see in the World.”
-Mahatma Gandhi

My ex-girlfriend said, “I feel so sad and pessimistic about the World. I couldn’t do anything for my mother when she was alive.”
Though she was my ex-girlfriend, we are very good friends now.
As we all know, time is the best teacher in our lives but no regret, lives move on.
I Interrupted her and said, “My friend, can I ask you a question?”
“Question, sure,” she replied.
“How often do you get these feelings of pessimism and sadness? I believe you didn’t have this habit when we were together,” I asked.
She said, “What do you mean “how often”? What kind of question is this?”
Once again I said, “Do you remain pessimistic all the time or few times in a day like early in the morning or late in the evening or most of the week or month or one or two times in a season?”
She paused for a moment and then said,” I guess I remain pessimistic and sad all the time, especially after my mother’s death.”
She felt pessimism, sadness and guilt about her situation, working too hard and not having enough time for her mother.
She always felt sad about not being a good enough daughter.
I said, “Can I tell you something, my friend?”
She nodded.

“We have to change our focus from what happened to our father or mother or sister or brother to what we can do for all fathers and mothers and sisters and brothers who are alive now.
We have to find a way to connect to help the ailing fathers and mothers, sisters, and brothers who are alive now.
This is the only way to get rid of your sadness and pessimism,” I said.
When my friend was a child, her mother was everything for her.
When her mother died, her mother didn’t know who she was.
Her mother died by her side with a disease called Alzheimer’s.
“I will never forget this moment in my life when my mother died in my arms without knowing that I was her daughter,” my friend said.

Alzheimer’s disease is the dominant form of dementia.
There are at least 50 million people suffering from it worldwide and at least 6 million only in the USA.
This touches roughly 10 percent people over 65 and more than 33 percent over 85 and up.
This disease kills more Americans than breast and prostate cancer combined.

By the way, a bit of science behind Alsheimer’s disease.
It is a serious plumbing problem in our brain.
Neuroinflammation causes it and leads to loss of brain function.
When the aging brain is unable to drain away the protein sludge that accumulates over time, billions of neurons die.
The neuroinflammation fuels the build up of two very specific proteins that cause plaque in the brain, amyloid and tau.
The cerebral cortex of the brain which is home to awareness, memory, language, and consciousness become non-functional.

According to Dr. Rudy Tanzi, a key expert for Alzheimer’s disease, a professor of Neurology at Harvard University, we have to make a few things a habit to reduce the risk of Alzheimer’s.
First, we need enough sleep which is mental floss that clears out amyloid naturally from the brain.
Second, we need social interaction that cuts Alzheimer’s risk by twofold especially when we enter adulthood.
Third, we have to control the stress which releases cortisol chemicals that cause neuroinflammation and kills neurons.

Good health is our foundation, no question, no argument.
My friend was physically healthy and active but she was still missing the quality of life.
Our quality of life is our mind, our thinking, our perception about life.
Quality of life means stopping whining, stopping worrying, stopping complaining, and stopping regretting.
Quality of life is spending quality time with family and quality friends, one more time quality friends, please know the difference between friends and quality friends.
Quality of life means giving, connecting, and sharing our honest and intimate emotions.
Just think about when you can not share your intimate emotions with your dying parents as a son or daughter, what does it feel like?
My friend was carrying the same emotions all her life.

But the truth is, we don’t know how many days we have left in front of us but we absolutely know how to use the remaining days, which are under our control.
The quality of our life is the quality of our everyday emotions.
It’s good to occasionally focus on what we missed but we shouldn’t make it a habitual thing.
If we always focus on what we don’t have, we never sustain happiness and quality in life.
We don’t experience life, we all experience what we focus on and the meaning we give to it, so we have to be very selective how we operate daily.

My dear friend,
We had a very memorable past and we are quality friends now so today I would like to take you on a journey back to history.
Probably, it will help you as well as others why we should be optimistic and happy in life moving forward.

In the time of early hominids, one million years ago, our ancestors would enter puberty at age of 12 or 13 and by the time they were 28, they were already grandparents.
The average age of early humans was only 28 years old.
In the middle ages, the average human lifespan was 35.
In 1900, the average lifespan was mid-40s.
Today, we are touching 80.
This is one snapshot of our life that tells why we should be optimistic and happy.

Let’s take another small picture.
In 1347, we had the most fatal pandemic called the bubonic plague in human history that killed around 200 million people.
Nobody found a cure of bubonic plague.
There was another pandemic that happened in 1918, the influenza called the Spanish Flu that killed at least 50 million people worldwide.
This virus is still with us today so we take an annual flu shot every year.
Recently, COVID-19 happened and hundreds of thousands people died but we invented a vaccine for it in 12 months so that many of us survived.
Many advanced technologies like mRNA vaccines, global high speed data connectivity, supercomputers helped to design, test, and distribute COVID-19 vaccines globally so that we controlled the sufferings of COVID-19 pretty quickly.
For global progress, big techs like Amazon, ZOOM, Google helped tremendously.

I remember, a few years ago, I would go to the library to find books, journals, or any literature. Today, I use Google.
Not only that, today, everyday, people around the world search on Google 5.5 billion times. These tech companies’ applications are woven into the fabric of our daily life around the world.
And most importantly, everyday, the weave of fabric gets tighter and tighter.
As a result, the majority of the world searches, shops, chats, banks, and performs many everyday activities online.
Today’s technology has become faster, cheaper, and better.
They have saved our time, money, and have made our lives easier and better in many ways.
The amazing thing is that they have made our lives interactive globally.
My friend, this is another reason we should remain optimistic and happy that as a human we are progressing all the time.

Let’s see how far we’ve come because this is directly related to our health and well being.
In 1981, 1 GB of hard drive storage used to cost us half a million dollars.
Today, for the same, it costs us 1 cent per GB.
In 1971, Intel’s first computer chip used to cost us $1 per transistors, where there were 2300 transistors.
Today, we have Core i9 and that has 7 billion transistors in less than a millionth of a penny each.
Our smart phone now is more powerful than any country government’s computational power in the early 90’s on the planet.
We have exponential growth in technology and we are not stopping.
We have 5G mobile service now, but we are not stopping. We are going in 6G soon and that can download 142 hours of Netflix in a second.

This fast technology will be life-changing for the health sector.
We can upload health data or get help from AI wherever we live in the world.
Just think, at the moment we connect more than 125 devices to the internet per second.

Very soon, each one of us will have the ability for real time monitoring of our health and biochemistry from sensors in our body.
Sensor measures everything from blood glucose to blood pressure to micro RNAs which indicates an impending heart attack and the quality of our sleep, diet, and lifestyle.
All of this data will be uploaded to an AI that monitors and advises our exact health status.
My friend, we should not be pessimistic, we should be optimistic all the time, that’s the only reason we are human, we are different from other animals.

The biotechnology industry experienced massive year-over-year growth, from $17 billion in 2019 investments to an all time high of $28 billion investments in 2020.
This investment is largely driven by medical breakthroughs in vaccine development and COVID-19 therapies.
In other words, this is another opportunity for us to grow in science, technology, and human health.
As Dr. George Church, professor of Harvard Medical School says “Exponential technology growth is especially effective in biology, which is now an information science.”
He is one of the hard core believers that even we, humans, can reverse our age.
This far we’ve come now.
There is already precedent for it.
Dr. David Sinclair, a professor of Harvard Medical School has already published a landmark paper in Nature in 2020.
The theme of the paper is there is a backup copy of youthful information in the cell that we can access which gives us the ability to reboot cells.
The crux of this discovery is if we can do this in mouse eye cells, then we can do this in other organs and tissues as well.
It means we can reverse our age too.
I’m just reminding you, my friend, this is the time to be optimistic and happy.

Let’s not take anything for granted.
When we find a bigger cause in our lives, we heal physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, and that is the ultimate goal of living.
I wish you all the best, my friend.

Thank you for your time.
-Yam Timsina